maryland.

get.

ready.

i'm coming

home.

next weekend.

i hope to see as many people as possible in the short 46 hours i'll be on the east coast. i don't plan on sleeping much.

take care in this small place.

*******found, read, appreciated and scooped up this card today in a quaint shop in downtown littleton.

risky, but wonderfully necessary, business. *******

maryland meets colorado.

this entry has been delayed secondary to internet problems and a busy life. but it is worth posting, even if late.

my dear girls, annie and anna, came to visit me! what a wonderful gift to me - for them to spend their money and time to come see me. it was truly a rich blessing. a much needed taste of home.

i will spare you a lot of writing as you would be reading for hours if i were to write of all of our adventures together. instead, i'll let annie's pics give you a taste of our time together. for a full photo report, see her flickr (www.flickr.com/photos/juliannaelise)

around the house

outside by the pond

art museum and stella's coffee shop

downtown for dinner and the art show

colorado springs

at the airport

boba @ lollicup

the west is a different place.

i feel like i'm getting a new education living out here. many things i've never heard of or seen or done. it's kinda fun. like the thrill you get when you visit a new country, but without being so intimidating and uncomfortable. so here's something new.

boba. otherwise called bubble tea.

my new friend peter introduced me to this interesting little drink. it's like a smoothie, but has these tapioca balls floating in the bottom of it. they are a funny texture - kinda like you have really soft, round gummy candies in your drink.

then they give you these really fun, fat straws so you can drink them up.

they have all sorts of flavors. i had coconut. peter had honeydew.

strangest flavors: avacado and green bean.

we tried boba at this little asian tea shop called lollicup. so asian. notice all the little animated figures.

so i'm living in . . .

and while i haven't taken a ton on pics since i've been here, i do have a few to share. below you will find just a few shots of my cute little cozy apt.

first - 'HI!' there's me. notice the tee. that's where i work. craig hospital. check out the link next door. fantastic place to work. 100 year anniversary.

now for the apt.

the front door.

dining room.

opposite the wall mirror.


my frig is already covered.


kitchen. after having people over for dinner. before doing the dishes.

bathroom colors.

spare bedroom. (for those of you who knew my last apt, the spare room is decorated like my old living room was. come visit so you can see for yourself.)

my bedroom colors. (found this coverlet at pier 1 for under $20. was originally over $200. pretty sweet deal.)

thes best way to see is just to come. really. pictures don't do it justice.

notice: this blog entry has been stolen.

if you recognize that it was stolen from you, please do not contact your lawyer, call the police or take offense. it is only stolen and posted here because, quite frankly, it needs to be read by people. over and over again. and while it certainly applies to my current adventure, i imagine with all that this life brings, it may have some relevancy and bring some hopefulness for each of us as we stumble thru things.

I do not ask to see the way
My feet will have to tread;
But only that my soul may feed
Upon the living Bread.

’Tis better far that I should walk
By faith close to His side;
I may not know the way I go,
But oh, I know my Guide.

And if my feet would go astray,
They cannot, for I know
That Jesus guides my falt’ring steps,
As joyfully I go.

And tho’ I may not see His face,
My faith is strong and clear,
That in each hour of sore distress
My Savior will be near.

I will not fear, tho’ darkness come
Abroad o’er all the land,
If I may only feel the touch
Of His own loving hand.

And tho’ I tremble when I think
How weak I am, and frail,
My soul is satisfied to know
His love can never fail.

not-so-subliminal message:

hide-and-go-seek in denver

i wrote this in an email to a friend recently. felt it best described my feelings over the last week or two so i wanted to share with the rest of you.

this transition has been . . . well . . . strange.

i suppose any transition is, but this one has topped all the others.

the only word i seem to be able to find to describe my current feeling is - lost. now, it's not like i don't know where i am; it's more like i feel like everyone else doesn't know where i am. like when you are playing hide-and-go-seek and you are the one hiding. that kind of lost.

but then it's also that strange knowledge that i am in this huge city and no one even knows who i am or that i'm here. and it's not actually a game of hide-and-go-seek. so in essence, no one even knows they should be looking for me.

and i guess that's where being the new person is tough. you have to find your own way out of lostness sometimes. you have to put yourself out there, speak up in conversations, initiate coffee dates with people; otherwise you just keep on not being known.

i think once i get into a routine with work, get moved into this new place, find a church, much of that will start to dissipate. but for now, that's where i am. and that's ok. comes with the territory.

looking back

mom was showing my some of the scrapbooking she's been doing tonight. much of it was of her younger years - her baby book and into elementary school. a couple of things struck me as incredibly funny. i share them here with you:

this

was an excuse note that mom wrote to her teacher to try and get out of p.e. class one day. she said she distinctly remembers her friends saying, 'oh pam, that looks just like a grown-up wrote it. miss kates will definitely think it's from your mom!' funny thing is, the teacher let her out of class that day - not because she believed the note, but just because she thought it was funny. then she told my mom to take the note home to her mom - and she did!!! my mom's 'bicycle license.' you say: 'sarah, i didn't even know they made such a thing.' well, apparently back in 1962 they did.

lastly (and this is my favorite). my mom grew up in a very small town in texas. so small, in fact, that when you had a birthday party, it got written up in the paper! my favorite line: 'the small, long table was covered with a circus-patterned tablecloth and centered with balloons covered with stars.' they bring you all the details in andrews, tx. you'd think they'd been covering the world's best party ever. but no, just your standard 3-yr-old birthday party. wow.

even funnier, my mom has a newspaper clipping that reports that her cousins came to town to visit. that's all. just that they came to visit.

i promise. i'm not making it up. i guess in a small town you'll take whatever news you can get.

loving people deeply hurts a lot sometimes.

i have beef with hallmark.

and any other card company, for that matter.

i need a specific kind of card. i went to hallmark thinking i would find some. hallmark has cards for everything, yes? obscure holidays like boss's day (a whole section of cards!!!). weird ones like "from your pet" cards and "have fun on your upcoming trip" cards.

but let me just tell you: they do not have everything.

goodbye cards are non-existant. granted, if you are the person saying goodbye to someone who is leaving, you have a fair selection. but there are no such cards if you are the person who is acutally leaving. there are no "I am going away and will miss you more than you know" cards.

so there's my beef.

luckily, i know how to write my own sappy messages.

from Valley of Vision:

Father of Jesus,
dawn returns,
but without thy light within no outward light can profit;
give me the saving lamp of they Spirit that I may see thee,
the God of my salvation, the delight of my soul,
rejoicing over me in love.
I commend my heart to they watchful care,
for I know its treachery and power;
guard its every portal from the wily enemy,
give me quick discernment of his deadly arts,
help me to recognize his bold disguise as an angel of light,
and bid him begone.
may my words and works allure others to the highest walks
of faith and love!
may loiterers be quickened to greater diligence by my example!
may worldlings be won to delight in acquaintance with thee!
may the timid and irresolute be warned of coming doom
by my zeal for Jesus!
cause me to be a mirror of thy grace,
to show others the joy of thy service,
may my lips be well-tuned cymbals sounding thy praise,
let a halo of heavenly-mindedness sparkle around me
and a lamp of kindness sunbeam my path.
teach me the happy art of attending to things temporal
with a mind intent on things eternal.
send me forth to have compassion on the ignorant and miserable.
help me to walk as Jesus walked,
my only Savior and perfect model,
his mind my inward guest,
his meekness my covering garb.
let my happy place be amongst the poor in spirit
my delight the gentle ranks of the meek.
let me always esteem others better than myself,
and find in true humility an heirdom of two worlds.

how much i desire this to be my life . . .

shh . . .

silence is the simple stillness of the individual under the Word of God. we are silent before hearing the Word because our thoughts are already directed to the Word, as a child is quiet when he enters his father's room. we are silent after hearing the Word because the Word is still speaking and dwelling within us. we are silent at the beginning of the day because God should have the first word, and we are silent before going to sleep because the last word belongs to God. we keep silence solely for the sake of the Word, and therefore not in order to show disregard for the Word but rather to honor and receive it.

silence is nothing else but waiting for God's Word and coming from God's Word with a blessing.

--bonhoffer, "the day alone", life together

a walk in the clouds

isn't that the name of a movie? well, i really did it. today. i walked in the clouds.

and that is just one of many pretty darn cool things that i did today. a quick run-down:

today, I:

had chipmunks eating out of my hand.

walked in the clouds.

played in the snow while wearing short and sandals.

felt the snow falling from the sky in the middle of july.

climbed past 12,000 feet.

saw elk and moose.

crossed the continental divide.

spent 7.5 hours in the mountains of colorado with my precious mother and father.

check out more pics on facebook.

(and if all of that wasn't good enough, then i got to spend some quality time with gordon at the driving range and out for smoothies.)

AHHH, A GOOD DAY.

growing up

the other night, we were sitting looking at old pictures of our childhood that my mom is putting into scrapbooks for us. the one she is currently working on is called "just the 2 of us" - all pics of my brothers together over the years.

it is a strange thing as the eldest sibling to watch your younger siblings grow up. it's very easy for us "first children" to continually look at our younger counterparts thru the same eyes we saw them thru years ago. especially when we are around them all the time.


it has been amazing for me over the past several years to watch my brothers grow into adults. for some reason, this trip has accentuated that more than any other.

• watching gordon, dressed in his business-casual striped button-down and khakis with name badge around his neck and walkie on his hip, in action at his job at Coors Stadium the night we went to the game.


• visiting brandon's apartment in downtown denver where he lives with his girlfriend and a new kitten that they adopted.


• having my brother invite me out for sushi and say he is paying!


• discussing serious life issues with both of them instead of fighting about who did what.

crazy how quickly that change to adulthood happens. seems like just recently we were all at home together playing with our friends and sitting at the dinner table for meals.

but the reality is that my bros are not the little kids that i used to see them as. they are grown men. and i am so proud to say that i am their sister.

as strange as the change is, i rather like it.

ironic freedom

(a bit from my journal. so if it's a bit stream of consciousness or thoughts are left out or jumbled, just bear with me.)

freedom is the buzz word, particularly around this time of year . . . the freedoms we hold as American citizens. largely, we, the American public, think of freedom as an American concept, principle, idea, lifestyle. but it occurred to me the other day that freedom is not an American-originated concept - rather it is the design of God that we be free. and free from more than just man-made dominion and manipulation, but free from the spiritual and fleshly holds that bind our hearts.

the biblical idea of freedom is expressed all throughout the new testament, but the concept is interesting. where we are quick to think that freedom means doing or being what we want, scripture clearly shows us that that is a misunderstanding of true freedom. we can never be absolutely free beings because we are not absolutely self-sustaining. we are always serving someone or something. and ultimately, we are all under the authority of a Sustainer.

read the words of this song carefully, to understand them:

from jonny diaz (a singer you should check out if you don't know):

it's like a thousand pounds of irony
come crashing down on top of me
the day i learned what it means to be free.

a heart that is enslaved to you
two feet that remain chained to you
and follow you wherever you may lead.

then you'll see a heart that's free.

an enslaved heart, chained feet, following someone else's path = freedom??? yes. this is precisely what we see in scripture.

from jesus (again, read slowly and carefully):

if you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the
truth, and the truth will set you free . . . truly, truly i say to you, everyone
who commits a sin is a slave to sin. the slave does not remain in the
house forever; the son remains forever. so if the Son sets you free, you
will be free indeed. --john 8:31, 34-36

from paul:

for one who has died has been set free from sin. now if we have died
with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him.
--romans 6:7

death = freedom; the person who has died has been set free and will live with Christ; therefore, to live with Christ is to live in freedom.

i don't think i'm so good at doing this. i don't think the church as a whole is good at this. our tendancy is towards rules and regulations, not freedom.

so what does it mean to live as free people in Christ???

1 peter 2:16-17

live as people who are free, not using your freedom to cover up for evil, but
living as servants of God. honor everyone. love the brotherhood. fear God. honor the emperor.

galatians 5:13-14

for you were called to freedom, brothers. only do not use your
freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but thru love serve one another.
for the whole law is fulfilled in this one word: 'you shall love your neighbor
as yourself.'

there are all sorts of directions that you can go with this whole topic . . . the truth of adoption into God's household, the implications of these last two passages, etc. i'll leave that for your pondering if you care to. i would recommend looking at how freedom is used in other passages too, regarding both us as fallen creatures and creation itself (somewhere in romans). i may have more to say on this later.

camp time

spent two days in the BEAUTIFUL Shenandoah mountains with some of my favorite people.

a few pics to share from our adventures.

joshua setting up camp.

popcorn and card games.

keith testing out the wire fence. it didn't hold so good.

mary showing us how it's done in the boulders.

anna and luke taking in the view.

dean whittling by the fire.

john taking a break near the summit.

the whole gang.

for more pics, check out facebook.